Bittersweet, and I don't mean chocolate

Today was the day,, "T" went home to her mom. I braved the roads to the ferry this morning, did the round trip (5 hours return), then it was fog and snow all the way home. Started out at 10:30am, got home just before 7pm. It was sooooo heartwarming to see mother and daughter reunited in time for Christmas, but heartwrenching to return home without her. Hence,, bittersweet. Nothing in this world makes me happier than to see my daughter and granddaughter happy, together, content. Unfortunatly for me, this means I have a huge hole in my heart that won't be filled until I see them again. It's not like they live in another country, or another planet for that matter, but,,,, that stupid ferry can cost an arm and a leg to travel on. There are rumours of a bridge, but I can't see that happening in my life time. I lived on the island for 17 years, and only came back to the mainland just over 2 years ago. I know I could move back, but at what point do you live your life for you, not your kids. You also have to hit a point where you accept your kids lives are seperate from your own and they need to move on as well. We have phones, we have Facebook, we have msn and webcams so it is not complete cut off, but ooooooooh the hugs, the "good morning Grandma" the "good night Grandma", I can't bring myself to walk into her bedroom just yet. That is when the tears will come. OMG, I sound like I have lost her forever,, lol. I just need to indulge in a little self pity, then I will be fine... and oh ya, maybe some chocolate! Maybe bittersweet stands for chocolate after all.

Be careful what you wish for

Ok, so I have been whining about snow, or lack of. My last post was of the joys of snow, and sludging through it. Yes, I LOVE LOVE LOVE walking in the snow, especially when it *squeeks* beneath my boots. But..... "T" is suppose to go home to her mom's for Christmas. Well, thanks to the latest dump of snow, we may not get there. In order to get her home, it is an hour to the ferry, then a two hour ferry ride to the island. The roads are not clear, so how I am suppose to get her to the ferry is a mystery to me. Unless I catch a ride on a snowblower, or a snowmobile, I am at a complete loss. She has assured me and her mom she is ok with holding off on Christmas, but tonight I caught her quietly crying in the bathtub. I don't know how much was bathwater and how much was tears! She wants her mom, Christmas or not, and when you promise a child (in nice weather) they are going home, a white out blizzard just doesn't cut it as an excuse to break that promise. Broken promises lead to broken hearts,, hers, her mom's, and mine. We are going to make an attempt tomorrow to get to the terminal, but I have warned her that if it is not safe, we are turning back. If ever I have wished for a Christmas miracle, now is the time. I would write a letter to Santa myself if I thought he would make a special trip on his sleigh! Wish us luck everyone!

A Good Dump (of snow that is!)

Yaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy! Snow has arrived! Parts of the lower mainland already had it, but my home was bypassed :( Finally it is here!!!!!!!!! I love snow, I guess because we don't get much, or very often, I really enjoy it while I can. I can understand some 'grumpy snow bunnies' out there, but I am not one of them! I only needed ONE thing from the store last night, and so, after 20 minutes of bundling up, off we trudged! Yes, I could have taken the car, but why? The roads were pretty bad actually, so taking the car would have been a risk, but who wouldn't want to walk into blizzard conditions just for the heck of it. "T" had a bit of a hard time, she was so layered up she was having a hard time moving, but every time I looked at her, all I saw was glowing red cheeks peeking out over a massive smile. I eventually realized it wasn't really a smile, just her face had frozen into that position. Either way though, I happily plodded on. Took about 20 minutes to get there ( a 2 minute drive under normal conditions), 5 minutes to find and purchace item, and 40 minutes to fight the wind home. I couldn't believe how much easier it was to walk with the wind at my back. My eyes were being pelted with snow, like someone was throwing darts at my face. Tears were streaming from them, oddly enough they didn't freeze to my cheeks. "T" was now sporting a new frozen face, a bit more of a grimace than a smile this time, but after I threatened to leave her in a snow bank and I would come back in the spring for her, she managed to speed up a bit. By now my "Winter Wonderland" feeling was turning into a"Winter What-the-hell-was-I-thinking" feeling. Our house is white, I was afraid I would walk right past it,, lol. We did arrive home, another 15 minutes of unlayering and throwing everything into the bathtub to thaw and drip. Hot chocolate was made, well, ok,, wine was also poured,, heehee, and after cleaning out the tub I had a HOT Shower. The best part? The snow is still here, and I think I forgot something at the store........

Fab contest on Fab Grandma's blog!

Over at Fab Grandma's blog (one of my favourites to read everyday!) she has a contest going on where you can win a awesomely cool gift! Check it out!
http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=6518503
I hope I did that right, her blog is
http://fabgrandma.blogspot.com

Pow-wow WOW!

As you may or may not know, my granddaughter is living with me. My daughter is working full time, and decided to add to that by going back to school. We decided that "T" would come here and go to school for the first half of the school year. We live in a neighborhood full of kids, the school is right around the corner, so why not, right? It has been an adventure to say the least! When my daughter was in school, I worked, so I missed school functions, field trips etc. I feel like I have been given a second chance to make that up, and I am loving it. Sadly it does cut into my computor time,, lol. "T" is half native (Coast Salish) on her dad's side, and when she is on the island her school is immersed in her culture. Over here, not so much. I was lucky to find a Pow-Wow class they were holding in the evening at her school. Last night was the Aboriginal dinner, and the kids got to dance. My throat closed up, my eyes watered up, and my heart filled up. To see her dance with her robe on, the drums, the singing, it made everything 'right'. The evening was fantastic, they have a huge dinner after the dancing, then Santa made his appearance. "T" sat on his lap, and when he asked her what she wanted for Christmas, she said "my family happy". How many times can I have my eyes get all misty in one evening?? Good thing I had on my water proof mascara. Then in another room, the have the Kids Christmas store. People donate things, NICE things, and the kids are given a shopping list to fill out. The put the names and ages of people they need to buy Christmas gifts for, then they go with a Santa helper, and shop. Things cost as little as 25cents, and they come out with their bags of stuff that the parents are not aloud to see. It is a great idea, because now the kids really felt like they shopped for mommy and daddy for Christmas! "T" bought for her mom, her mom's boyfriend, his son, and of course,,, ME!!!! Her bag of stuff is tucked away in her room, I am not allowed to peek, and she is wrapping them up today. I admit, I do like the homemade gifts that my daughter used to make more than anything in the world, but I am pretty stoked to see what she picked out. I think this is officially the last year that Santa will be real for "T". She is really questioning it now, and flip flops daily on it. She decided a few times that he wasn't real, then went to school and had indepth conversations with her friends, and decided to hold out hope for a little while longer. She said to me, "what can it hurt? It means an extra gift right?" Hmmm, not greedy at all eh? Now I am off to catch up on everyone elses blogs, Happy Weekend!

I am having an affair,,,, WITH MY HOUSECOAT!

Nobody can hug me like my housecoat can! It is black, big, soft and makes me feel wuuuuuunderful. The problem is, it also takes away all my energy. I find if I stay in my housecoat, it literally saps away any insperation I may have otherwise started my day with. I lounge, I flop, I shuffle. Get me in clothes right away, I bounce, I bound, I fly! Being caught in the middle of the afternoon in my housecoat is a bit like being caught with another man in the house, you quickly run and tell it to hide in the closet, you straighten your hair, tuck in your shirt, and zip up your pants, like you have been caught doing something 'wrong'!. Today started out as a housecoat day, for the last week and a half, I have been staying at a friends house while she was away. I got up early every morning to drive the 40 minute drive back to drive my granddaughter to school, then do all the things I need to do on a normal day. Afternoon hits, pick up my granddaughter and do the drive back again. No real 'lounge' time. Today is the first full day back, and the only full day I will get for awhile. Tomorrow I am heading to the island, then back, then have company for a day or two (hopefully two) so me and my housecoat won't be properlly reaquanted till next week. I did of course have to remove (sob sob) my housecoat to get my granddaughter to school, which is around a 4 minute walk, and had every intention of returning to housecoat mode. Then I realized I needed to go to the store, then of course I chatted with a neighbor, and now I am fully dressed and my housecoat is laying on my bed, seductivily waiting for me, calling for me even! Good thing I am strong, I have shut the bedroom door to stave of temptation, and plopped myself down with a steaming mug of coffee and decided to catch up on blogs (mine and others). So,, do you have any particular article that inspires you, or depletes your energy? They say clothes make the man,, well, I sometimes think my housecoat could replace a man, how bout you?

Bad Book Etiquette

I have been enjoying reading How Will It End's blog, and she has posted a few entries on books she has read. Another blog that posts on books is Hot Lunch. I love to read, but I have been told I have a bad habit that is disrepectful to fellow readers everywhere. No, I don't lick my fingers to turn pages, I don't bend corners to mark my place, what I do is supposidley soooo much worse. I read the BACK OF THE BOOK FIRST!!! (wipes brow, wow, that took alot to admit). I read enough at the beginning to find out who is who, what is what, where is where, then I jump to the back to find out who dies, who lives, and who-dun-it. (yes, I read mysteries alot). When Harry Potter came out, it was released in England before Canada, so there I was online 8 hours ahead of our release times, and looking for spoilers as fast as people could blog them. I still read the books, but I like to know the ending. What if I get hit by a bus before finishing a book? How would I ever know the ending then? I do the same with movies by the way, there are a few movie sites that post spoilers, or just the endings. Before watching anything, I look up what is going to happen and how it will end. It doesn't take away any enjoyment for me, but it does for anyone unfortunate enough to be watching with me. If, for some horrible reason, I can't find a spoiler, I drive people insane asking, "will he live", "what happens to her?". I watch movies alone alot, lol. This obession may have two different beginnings. First, Bambi, which had a death I never saw coming, in a cartoon of all things! Then there was the book Anne of Green Gables, another unexpected death! I vowed never to have that happen again! Is my habit really so bad? Will it change the world as we know it? I don't think so. Will it make my friends want to gag me before watching a movie with me? Yes, but that's ok, it will cut down on my snack bill at the theatre.